May 192014

GodzillaThe gang wanted to watch Godzilla over this past weekend and, as I am for most summer movies, I was game.  Seeing as how studios can no longer come up with an original idea for a movie if their lives depended on it, or if they weren’t so chicken, we have another reimagining/reboot of the classic Japanese monster.  I am probably going to get into spoilers below, but honestly, there really isn’t that much to spoil.  But, you’ve been warned.

In this latest Godzilla movie, the famous monster is not a creature hell bent on destruction.  On the contrary, he is actually a type of “god” that brings balance to the planet.  Two monsters are born and are determined to breed, regardless of who gets in their way.  They are so huge and destructive that the puny humans can do nothing to stop them.  What’s worse, they feed on nuclear energy, so nuclear weapons can do them no harm.  And that is where Godzilla comes in.  No, he is not a monster that just destroys buildings.  He is the King of Monsters, the one who must stop the others from wreaking havoc on the world.  And that is about the entire plot of the movie.

It was not a bad movie, but in no way did I think it was any good.  It was way too long for what it is.  I mean, the movie is titled Godzilla, so you would think that Godzilla would have more screen time.  And if you thought that the movie would be entirely filled with monster fighting monster, you would be wrong.  The first couple “fight” scenes were not even shown on screen.  Just the beginning and the aftermath.  Seriously?  Was there not enough budget to show the entire fight scenes, or was it just a way to try to tease the audience into sticking around for the end?  Trust me, the movie could have been cut down.  And the made up human drama in the film?  Not necessary and a complete time filler in this movie.  Elizabeth Olsen is cute and all, but she served absolutely no purpose in this film.  For whatever reason, no matter where she ran to hide, the monsters showed up there and you could hear her once again screaming in fear.

Apparently I am just becoming an old, cranky guy that hates everything because this movie made a crapload of money.  Like I said, it was not a bad movie, but I don’t think it was as good as the box office demonstrated it to be.  The movie was definitely better than that piece of crap film that Matthew Broderick in which just about the only thing I remember of that movie was him giving Godzilla a pregnancy test.  Really?  Whoever wrote that film, upon reading it over for review, still felt that was a good idea to put in?  But regardless, this latest movie did have some entertaining fight and destruction scenes in the end.  It just needed more of them, seeing as how the title of the film is Godzilla.  When that sequel does eventually come out, here’s hoping there is less made up Elizabeth Olsen screaming for her life scenes and more Godzilla fighting other huge monster ones.

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